she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
