I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
