he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize