I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Randomize
