Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
