hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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