I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
