what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
