i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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