Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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