Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
