how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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