Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
