I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
sarcasm needs its own font
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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