Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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