Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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