We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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