it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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