im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm bleeding and have questions
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize