why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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