The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
