can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
