3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
