He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize