so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
