I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
