there's paper in my vomit.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
