So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize