I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
