Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Randomize