She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize