Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
your like the ambassador to my penis.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I want to fling myself into the sun
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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