As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Randomize
