Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
