naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
