Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
