your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
