Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
