can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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