Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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