Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I'm really into asian looking animals
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
