Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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