I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
