"it" just moved
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
