I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize