I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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