in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
