I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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