Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
My life is pants optional.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
