Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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