dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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